toughest times

Hola, this is my first post in 2012. It rained almost every day, makes Indonesia seemed in the winter lol. The temperature can be fairly cold, about 19-23 degrees. And this is forcing me to always wear a jacket to school. Okay, back to the topic which I will talk about. It's about college, as well as a variety of school stuffs. 

For 12th grade student like me, this is the toughest times. Really, really, tough. All that is done will determine your future, I think. I should have started to reduce my playing time, but it was hard. I was really wooed by it. Every time I wanted to start to study, there must be something that made me cancel it. Is that inappropriate for me to study, to become a better person?? Perhaps my faith isn't strong enough to withstand that devil's temptations. My prayers have to be improved, much improved. 

It was January and about two months I and all my friends will face a practice exams and final exams. Oh God, is that as fast as the time goes?! There has been no preparation whatsoever... when my friends have started to look ready. I feel like the smartest man in the universe ha! So far, luck is always up to me, Alhamdulillah. But not forever I can hang it all on luck right? 

Talking about college makes me fed up. It makes me dizzy thousand circumference. I'm interested in international relations, but I saw that my parents somewhat disagree with my choice. They always remind me to think carefully. They really wanted me to work after graduation, so well with me. But no diploma courses for majors that I want. This drives me stress like crazy. 

Many people said "Your parents' choice is God's choice", is it true? I'm convinced that my choice is the best choice for me (maybe yeah). But everything I give to my God the almighty one, Allah swt. I can only try and pray as much as possible so that He would give me the best of the best. I want my parents proud of me. Prove that I'm not just a parasite. And I'm not a person that is not useful and helpful. 

With Allah permission, and prayers of you all, this will make all my dreams come true. I will always pray for all my friends out there so they will get everything what they want. Amin